Being in my mid-twenties I think I’m finally in a good(ish) position to be able to give certain pieces of advice or tell people what to avoid. As an older sister, it is also my job to explain to my younger siblings that people give horrible advice and I usually tell them what to do if I’m 100% confident in it.
In layman’s terms – I’m used to telling people what to do.
The stigma behind any display of mental health issues is so real it’s actually a joke. People can’t understand that the brain is an organ and it can also affect people and some seriously messed up ways. For some reason, its easier to empathise with someone who’s going has injured their arm and tell them to go to the doctors, but if someone has depression or anxiety they’ll suggest you get over it.
Anyone who’s ever had someone says that knows that it’s quite possibly one of the worst things you could tell someone to do when they’re going through any form of mental health issues.
Another dishonourable mention in this category is:
“Don’t take antidepressants, just eat healthily and drink water and you’ll be fine.”
Spoiler alert – that doesn’t work. Getting medical advice and seeing a professional does wonders, even counselling. CBT works to rewire the persons thought processes, and it works for so many different issues and has saved so many people across the globe.
One piece of advice that is truly awful, that is truly disgusting and that is why so many people stay in the dark place – you’re not the only one, so snap out of it. Now, on the one hand, I get it, there are 7-8 billion people in the world and everyone has their own unique struggle, however, just because someone else is going through something that doesn’t automatically diminish your own journey. It’s like telling someone they can’t be happy because other people are happy – ridiculous right?
Whatever you decide you’re going to be, your parents will be happy with it. Now someone people do have parents who are truly happy with what they will decide to become in the future, but this isn’t the case for most people. I understand that parents just want the best for their children, so they tend to pressure them to go for being a doctor or a lawyer because it’s seen as a stable income and they won’t have to worry about them. But not everyone can or wants to go into those fields, so if
Obviously, not everyone is going to want to do those kinds of jobs, so it’s best to do what you want to do, or what you feel is safe, and to not feel the pressure of pleasing everyone.
Has anyone ever said these two magical words to you – don’t worry? Has it ever stopped you worrying? Because personally it makes me even more worried and leads to an endless spiral of anxious thoughts and overthinking. If you truly don’t want someone to worry, don’t tell them this, just say anything else. Or maybe deflect the issue and buy cats, cats help everyone.
Last but not least – get over it. I honestly don’t know if people think that will help someone to move through their issues, but ‘get over it’ does nothing but put pressure on the recipient. You’re better off giving the person the tools and advice alongside this phrase, or maybe be nicer about the way you phrase it.
I can’t take all the credit with thinking of these phrases as my Instagram followers helped me generate these answers. (hint hint, follow me on Instagram @fatimaspeaks)
What is the worst advice you’ve received?
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