When it comes to manipulation we tend to think about the more obvious kinds, the types that we know straight away are bad like physical or pschological. The thing is, most people practice the art of emotional manipulation every single day and many aren’t even aware of it, which is not only scary but also means that most of us are receiving some form of emotional manipulation or even abuse without even knowing it, or having the right language to describe what it is.
It took me a long time to be able to identify it and now it’s time to share some of my findings, alongside some things I read online because I don’t want to spread any misinformation about important topics.
- They make your pain or your experiences all about them.
- They open up too much very quickly, now opening up is great and a sign of a friendship being formed, but emotionally overloading you all the time is a bad sign.
- They’re always the victim.. always! To the point that your suffering is their suffering and will also become your fault.
- Tying in with point 3, they’re also always making themselves out to be martyrs..
- They use their sadness as a way to gain sympathy which then leads to a lot of selfish acts and dismissal over your own emotions.
- They’ll make you feel bad for voicing your own opinions. They’ll use everything from their mental health to their own personality ‘You know I’m an anxious person, why would you say that?’.
- They never take accountability over anything. You’ll never receive an apology and an acknowledgement of them doing anything wrong.
- They’ll one up you on everything, both positive and negative.
- They’ll criticise you and use your own insecurities against you.
- Guilt trips are their best friend and they’ll milk them for all they’re worth.
- They’ll also use ultimatums as a means of manipulating you.
- They’re super passive aggressive, to the point of using petty actions like the silent treatment and then using statements like ‘you should know why I’m angry’.